"To the impartial eye, the world not only seems an unlikely one-off phenomenon, but a constant strain on reason. If reason exists, that is, if a neutral reason exists. So speaks the voice from within. So speaks Joker's voice." - Jostein Gaarder

Sunday, May 21, 2006

She

For all the time spent trying to figure out, trying to put it on to paper, for all the love, for all the things that i had to say and never said, for all the things i still cant explain and i still cant put to paper, for the whole 5 years late...

For everytime she cried, she puffed, and I freezed...

For May,

she's the one in all my favorite songs, and she's the one singing them for me...

she's the one that makes this world a less cruel place, sometimes a bit difficult to understand how she can manage to do so... when u go deep, how can someone replace all that crueltly, hatred and racism with love...

Her eyes blaze when looking at u, they dont sparkle, they lit, and there u see, u see urself in there.. all naked, and vulnurable but safe.. u let go... u dont believe that it's u, it cant be, no one can see through people, u lose focus when she's looking, the world blurs, and when u come back to reality u realized that u're crying...

She's Maya, Nino, Maria, Catherine, Charlotte. Sophie... she's thE "Female", she's every charachter in all ur favorite novels, she's everything anyone ever written.. she's the poem that u can't write... so u can only borrow the words...

She's the reason why Humans developed tools, she's why they invented writing, why Ghenghis Khan invaded the world, why the World War II happened, why that butterfly out there in the far fluttered its wings... so u can meet her.

She's the proof that humanity is limitless, because she's not just so human, It's not only the fact that she's the real image of every destinctive particle in this human rrace, of every good thing or bad thing about us, of every intention and instinct they witnessed, she's a musuem, a moving piece of art... to me, there cant be a more real painting of this humanity than her, but it's not just that, she's more than Human... she's what human race can be... she's the proof that we can be gods. that we are gods.

Yeah she's a goddess, and I believe it.
I believe in god now, I know that feeling now... this is where I find my tranquility... for a whole year, this was the main question... for a whole 19 years this was my only hope... I believe now... I'm a reason now, I'm a basis, I'm a unique, I'm a believer, and she's my goddess.

She's my promise, the promise that I only told to myself, the promise that isnt a promise as much as a fact.

She's a soft breeze, a smell, a touch and a feel... the basics of sensing this world, she's the facts... the elements and the theories...

She's my oedipus complex, She's every sickness and every cure...

She's Astarte, the lion, the horse and the sphinx...

She's My latakia, My Syria, Egypt, Earth, The Universe and what's beyond, She's Me.

She's mine, and she's everybody else's... she's us, and us is for the world...

She's my fairy tale, just like i dreamed of it when i was a little boy... and for some odd reason, It doesnt feel weird that it EXACTLY happened the way i want it to be... it feels so normal, when u think of it, u dont believe it, but when u let ur feeling out.. it just tells u that this is normal... this is u, that's her.. and that's US... it's normal.. it couldnt happen any other way aslan... for us both...

She's every sigh, tear or smile that come out of me when i say B7ebbek...

وتحت سقف الليل والمطر
وبحضور الخوف... والأسماء... والعناصر
وكل ما لا اسم له في الكون
أعلن حبي لك واتحادي... بحزن عينيك
وأرض الزهر في بلادي
...



Some stuff that I should've said so long ago.. I've written and deleted them so many times, I don't say them because when I re-read back I realize how frail my language is... how short it falls behind what I wanna say, and how stupid and small they are to the truth...
when u read this, take that fact into consideration...

She's way beyond every word here, she's way beyond my ability to write or say... i can only feel it...

15 Comments:

Blogger Mirzade said...

well...
i dunno what to say, u know i am happy, i know i said some curel
things but u know how i am when i am upset...

"us" is happy ...very ....

أنت
أنا

المعجزة لا تكمن في الحب
المعجزة تتحقق عندما نحب
المعجزة تكتمل
عندما تحب شوائبي
وأحبها أنا
عندما أحب جنونك
وتحبه أنت
عندما تحب ضعفي
و أحب ضعفك
و نتحد

أنت
أنا

الحياة لست منصفة
و لكننا منصفين

أنت
أنا

أيام خلفنا
أعوام أمامنا

أنت
أنا
و مازن
;) since intelligence is genetic ya3ni Lol

bahebak
eternaly
|years...|

that's one message may and maya share ...u are the only thing
they share...

yours

May

P.S: my first japanese phrase : Ai shite imasu

May 21, 2006 1:53 AM

 
Blogger Eve said...

that's one of the loveliest thing i've ever read :)

May 21, 2006 6:30 AM

 
Blogger Soraya said...

Beautiful...Simply beautiful

May 21, 2006 8:34 AM

 
Blogger Omar said...

very impressive!
Niyala 3alek ;)

May 21, 2006 9:09 AM

 
Blogger Nisa_Rk said...

oh my god. that is so beautiful and so sweet!

May 21, 2006 11:35 AM

 
Anonymous haider said...

adam...go ahead....dont be hesitant as all of yr generation had been...sayig this wasnt easy...u are almost there...seek yr happines ..cos it is like constructing a building ,,u need tools..material..and decision
go ahead...

May 21, 2006 6:42 PM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

ALLA ye Khalikon Laba3ed
Tso

May 22, 2006 1:38 AM

 
Anonymous Mr.Z said...

Very sweet Yazan, wish you the best luck!
Hope you will listen to my nagging one day and post photos from Japan :)
P.S I hope my answer to your comment on "On the rule of Majority" didn't offend you or anything ?
Thank you for another enlightening post

May 22, 2006 2:33 AM

 
Blogger phoenician said...

ok my eyes r full of tears but i am jelous ...no just kidding u make me full of hope to see that there r still ppl know what rael love is
wish luck and god bless u both

May 22, 2006 2:57 AM

 
Blogger ayhm jzzan said...

لطالما كنت معبرا
لطالما كنت كاتبا مميزا
لطالما كنت شخصا مختلفا
لكنك الآن تثبت أنك كاتب مميز وشخص معبر ذو حس راقي وعالي ومرهف
بس بيني وبينك شكلك عن جد عاشق من الطراز الأول

May 22, 2006 5:50 AM

 
Blogger Mirzade said...

ayham yaz ma 3andoush terazzzzzzzzzz
:)
May

May 22, 2006 4:33 PM

 
Blogger Mirzade said...

yaz u changed my pic ????
it must be you...
plz raga3 the other one
bahebak
may

May 22, 2006 4:34 PM

 
Anonymous Zaher said...

i think That's what love is all about..
every lover should feel this way.

June 03, 2006 3:37 AM

 
Blogger Mirzade said...

zaher it's may HOW DOES UR BLOG WORKE!!??
:(
i cant figuer
Maya

June 05, 2006 9:01 PM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Super color scheme, I like it! Keep up the good work. Thanks for sharing this wonderful site with us.
»

July 22, 2006 10:46 PM

 

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