"To the impartial eye, the world not only seems an unlikely one-off phenomenon, but a constant strain on reason. If reason exists, that is, if a neutral reason exists. So speaks the voice from within. So speaks Joker's voice." - Jostein Gaarder

Wednesday, June 29, 2005

Record Breaking Tuesday

I just had my busiest day ever...
Tuesday... woke up exactly 5:30am... back to the same bed at exactly 6:30am the next day....

I got 2 swollen feet, one reallllllllyyyyyyy screwed up t-shirt [u should've been there Dina when I landed face2face into a lovely muddy pool... thank god my flat was 10mins away], a nerve-breaking headache and the best time ever with syrian bloggers...

here's a quick glance of yesterday....
05:30 woke up
07:00 my bus to damas took off
11:30 finally, got to damas after one whole hour delay
12:00 chasing time with Alaa to get to the jp embassy on time [thx a lot Alaa for waiting all that time, u rock]
17:30 got out of the embassy after 5 straight hours of tests including a japanese language test [regardless of what the hell the quiz was I maintained a "B" choice in that test... at least one of those Bs is gonna be right], that's where I got the Headache...
18:00 I met with Sinan in Nofara... then a nice tour in old damas, it's nice having someone who actually knows the area on such tours.
19:00 THE MEETUP [details are due VERY SOON].
21:30 Started the quest to answer the eternal question.. "Should I sleep over today.. or go to Latakia...?!!"
23:00 Tryna find a taxi so I could be on time for my 23:30 bus...
03:30 u'd think I'd give up and get some rest but NOOO... I get a call from Maad that they got a night shift in Roula's pharmacy... and so it is...!!!! another 3 hours of wandering around and driving lessons... [that's where i got the swollen leg]...
06:20 finally, home sweet home.... NOP.. I still got one more bump... I know I usually bump into posts and cars but into MUD?!?!!!!!... well, for my defence.. I was very tired!!!

I'm sooo proud I survived yesterday... hell, I'm proud I was able to maintain a human-kinda-appearance in the Meetup... [u know, 5 hours of scratching ur head could lead to a very very fucked up hair...]!!!

thx for everyone for making my day.. Alaa [Hope I didn't screw up ur Bakaloria chances this year.. hehe], Sinan for the lovely tour and everyone else from the blogging team for a great time after a hectic morning [Ayman, Ammar, Amr, Dina, Sara, Baher, Majd, Annie], the japanese guy who actually sat with us for 5 straight hours without a single word [man, get a life]... everybody in the pharmacy [there was a lot of ppl.. I don't even know half the names!!! Roula, Maad, Roa, Ayham... everyone..]....

cheers everone...

Saturday, June 25, 2005

13 things I now know about university

soo... I just finished my last exam in my first year at university life..!! I just finished 1/5 of my higher education... academic life.. [hopefuly I'm not gonna be stuck in first year]... so, it's been exactly 9 months... what did I come up with since last september...

-The honor of studying in the main library... before it turned into a meeting place and then into a cafe... and now I hear they're planning to start raves over there next semister.. they just need some lighting installations during summer...
-Accomplished the dream of every high-schooler of hanging out in "tijara" and skipping classes...
-Getting over the fact that we are the only faculty in this whole univ. with no Cafeteria... and getting over the phobia of buying drinks from other cafes...
-A good laugh whenever I remember our "Computing Basics" prof's 30min thesis about how VS.NET isn't an OOP platform.
-A hillarious laugh when I heard that that same prof is the dean of our faculty.
-A well-learnt lesson not to get into fights with ur profs cuz u may never actually pass their course ever again...
-Being a real idiot and answering the "How does a computer work?" dumb question with a bright supposed-to-be-sarcastic answer "Sharply and Brilliantly."... True, everybody laughed that day.. but it wasn't quite cool when I got 13/20 on my exam paper...
-Having the memory of an all-white-dressed-blonde tripping and falling with her nose on my shoe infront of more than 500ppl in "tijara"... never seen her since.. I think she dropped out or sth...
-534209437 ways of sneaking around and not getting to meet the guys from "al-hay2a al-edaryeh"... I donno why I hate them... nothing personal, but seems like theri jobs are to flatten ppl and shut em up and choke every single bit of creativity that might actually bloom!!!
-settling on 77% in my Communication Skills project [I busted my ass for 3 weeks on that one] about "Linux and OSS" because I didn't write the prof's name on the cover sheet while some peeps got 100% talking about "Bermuda". YEAH THE TRIANGLE!!!
-Fell in love with these little nescafe machines.
-I still donno why I'm always 5 mins late... I mean if I could make it there on 8:05 why can't I be there 8:00 sharp, and spare myself a couple smart-ass remarks from profs thinking that they're being quite funny!!! still a mystery.. maybe next year..
-Added some point to my putting-up with ppl skills and found some ppl who can actually put up with me.. [we even had bets on How Long they can?!]...

Well, u know me... I can only point at the dark side...


Friday, June 24, 2005


I haven't really been in the mood for writing all through last week...
I mean, look around, what am I supposed to write about?! ha..?!
have ya noticed that stuff are really going in a weird way all through last week, hell all through this month..
Should I write about George HAWI, should I say how odd it feels to find ppl like QASIR and HAWI dead while the warlords are still there playing their stinky games..?! it doesn't feel so odd after after a while ha?!
well, whatever I write about HAWI is gonna be well worn-out now...
Should I write a thank u letter to the syrian govt. for giving IDs to 225 thousand kurds after 40yrs of under-humane life conditions... well, thanx!! now they should start making the rest of the population feel like real citizens...
Should I write about Abu Jamal's latest lecture about freedom and how the Arab regimes are repressing their citizens and how we need democracy to evolve..?! am I the only one wondering if that was so hard to comprehend while he was still an active vice-president for one of the worst totalitarians in the 80s and 90s??!!
I'm starting to get sick... but I'm not finishing this post before throwing up completely...
Should I write about the closure of "Al-Mubki"?!! less than two weeks after the anti-currption congress...?!!
Should I feel happy because I was right.. because they clearly don't have the intentions or the powers needed for reform...?! am I right?!! I'm still keeping this small hope that I'm not... and I'm gonna hide it very well, otherwise I'm sure they'll be intrigued to come here and arrest IT!!
How bout writing how shocked I was, when god decided to bring down hails of rain in the middle of june...!!! and how soaked I was when I got home that day... well, someone got his share of curses for this...!!
or maybe about how MTV2 is playin Non-Stop "Green Day" while MTV-Hits is playing the new Foo Fighters' amazing single..?! did they flip-flop names or sth?!
or maybe I'd write about how the waiter in the Italian Corner brought us 1 gen-tonic when we asked for 2 and charged us for 4...

no..., non of em feels good enough so I'm just gonna post this line out of Radiohead's "Creep"...
You're so fuckin' special
I wish I was special
But I'm a creep, I'm a weirdo.
What the hell am I doing here?
I don't belong here.

Cheers everybody...

Tuesday, June 21, 2005

A different kind of me!

U wouldn't believe what i found today...
I'm toooo thrilled right now.. so this won't seem so coherent..!!
I was going through dad stuff from Beirut... and I found a poem I'd written for him when I was like 8 or 7 or sth... OMG>>>> I actually written that... I even remember the memo i used to write on it..!!! Jesus,...

In my whole life I wrote 2 stuff [I wouldn't call em poems in a lifetime]... this and another [I'm desperatly looking for it now]... this one I wrote in some bus while mom was sneaking me to beirut to see my pa.. in 1994.. cuz we weren't allowed to leave the country.. so she'd forged an ID and one for me too [we were the countrfeit family!! hehe]... and all the adrenaline at the borders and the looks... OMG everything comes back...

I love me... I'm actually giving up suicide for the time being!!!!!!!.... u don't know how it feels to find something like that after all this time... WOW... ... soo soooo thrilled..

Monday, June 20, 2005

Recommendation - Don't Believe The Truth

Album: Don't Believe The Truth
Band: Oasis
Notes: To those who are into Oasis' style.. this album is a much mature one... The guitars and Vocals are absolutly brilliant... If u're looking for another "Wonderwall" this isn't the place.. but if u liked their last album "Heathen Chemistry"... this one's the one! I loved Tracks 3,7,11... and "Lyla" is one beautiful song... I still can't get over it... it's been on my playlist since day 1... Lovely album... it slowly grows up on u... but if u're not an Oasis fan, it'll be a bit hard to comprehend their music... it'll take sometime... ;)

Friday, June 17, 2005

Pictures of my Life


My all-time favorite drink!

My old High-School... (Mutafaw2een)... strange memories there..

My Desk... where I do all my so-called studying... it's not always like this.. only on exams!

Me, My bestfriend (the fat guy)... doing Aerobics?! well.. i donno, we were just sooo bored!! TOTALLY BORED!\

My other bestfriend.. YUP the doctor.. playing on his n-gage.. [I loved that mobile.. and the bastard SOLD IT!!]

NO, I'm not fetish.. but she's got the weirdest sux ever!! keep it up susu!!!

Just a pic from the [Spontaneous] demonstrations the ppl of Latakia did against UN. Res. 1559... like 2 weeks before Dr. Bashar announced that we are fully with the implementation of 1559!! hehe!!

One of my All-time favorite songs... Pink Floyd - Another Brick in the Wall!!

Recommendation - Ports of Call

well, I'm going through this low couple of days... when u really got nothing to say.... so I thought I'd just post my all-time favorites.. in anything... in this Recommendation section...

Novel: Ports of Call (Les Echelles du Levant).
Novelist: Amin Maalouf.
Rated: 14368400635999/10.
Note: I read both the [Dar Al-Farabi] Edition and [Dar Wared] Edition.. and the first is soooo much better... get the first... the translator is Nahla Baydoun... I totally loved the translation!!

Wednesday, June 15, 2005


mmm, I just got a call from Lyse Doucet (Talking Point Host) YAAAAAAY!!! and they want me again in their show.. next sunday... at 5-6pm... they'll be talking about the Lebanese elections... and how they affect Syria and Lebanon... and yeah I'm gonna be talking!! hehe...

okay... this was just me showing off...!! BUT plz dooo watch the show.... I hope i don't screw up real bad..!!!!!

fingers crossed everyone!!!!!! yalla...

Ziad Sayed...

زياد: هول ليكي يا سلمى. هول مش ممكن يكونوا مع
العدالة الاجتماعية، ما افهمي.. لأنا بتنضر كتير من مصالحن!
سلمى: مش مظبوط. طب انتا اسماع اذاعتن. لي ما
بتسمع اذاعتن؟
زياد: أووو.. عمبسمع اذاعتن، مين قلك ما
سلمى: إي لو عمتسمع اذاعتن مظبوط. دايماً هني
بيحكوا و بيطالبوا بالعدالة. انو الاجتماعية والمساواة وتكافؤ الفرص وهيك. كتير هني
مع هالأشيا، مش متل ما انت بتضلك بتعبيلي راسي عنن!
زياد: طيب متل ما بدك.
سلمى: شو يعني، هلق ما عم نحكي، انت ما قلتلي
بدنا نناقش؟
زياد: اي نناقش، اي مبلى.
سلمى: اي طيب شو؟
زياد: اي هيدا مش نقاش.
سلمى: ليش كيف بيكون النقاش. انو يعني اذا ما
وافقت معك ع رأيك، لازم وافق معك ع رأيك.
زياد: لي هلق انتي شو ما بتسمعي بتصدقي. بركي
هول الجماعة باذاعتن عميكذبوا، ما واردة؟
سلمى: و ليش مش جماعتك تبع هول اليساريي ما
يكونوا عميكذبوا؟ ما بيكذبوا؟
زياد: أوففف هني اللي بيكذبوا.
سلمى: اي هه شفت.
زياد: ايه منيح هيك انبسطي؟
سلمى: اي لأ انو كل العالم بتكذب!
الزلمي: هلق عفواً يا جماعة، بس كل العالم بتحكي
نفس الحكي. والأخلاق بالحكي هيي ذاتها. المهم الممارسة.
زياد: الممارسة، يسلملي ربك.
الزلمي: بعدين الحكي ما عليه جمرك يا سلمى،
عفواً يعني.
سلمى: كيف يعني شو دخل الجمرك؟
زياد: تفضل بدا تناقش ومش سامعا
سلمى: سامعا بالجمرك، مين قلك؟ بس شو دخل الحكي
زياد: ما متل هيدا معروف، متل.. انو الحكي ما
عليه جمرك يعني فيكي تحكي شو ما بدك، فيكي تفشطي، فيكي تغلطي، وفيكي تحكي
الحقيقة... فيكي تقولي انك مع العدالة الاجتماعية وتكوني انتي اللي مسببة عدم
العدالة الاجتماعية.
سلمى: امم...
زياد: اي... وفيكي تقتلي عالم وانتي اللي تنعيون
وانتي تمشي بدفنن. عرفتي شو يعني الحكي ما عليه جمرك.
سلمى: اي ولشو النرفزة؟!
زياد: النرفزة، بسببك وبسبب مخك. مصدقة يعني انو
هول الحزب والجماعة مع العدالة الاجتماعية هيك لأنو يعني هني قالوا وبيقولوا...
وهالمخ لشو ناتعتيه؟!
سلمى: كل واحد حر برأيو. وبعدين حاجة تزفر
بالحكي وحتى لو كان الحكي بلا جمرك.
زياد: اي بأمرك.
الزلمي: يا جماعة بدون تشنج خلي
زياد: لأ بحياة ربك قديش حلوة شي حزب يكون ضد
العدالة الاجتماعية. هيك يطلع واحد من المكتب السياسي يقول، نحن ضد العدالة
الاجتماعية؟ معقولة هاي؟!
الزلمي: له طبعاً... لأ بس..
زياد: ما هي سلمى إلا ما يطلع يقول هيك ما رح
تصدق انو ضد العدالة الاجتماعية.

زياد الرحباني - العقل زينة.... راديو صوت الشعب - ع الموزة المتوسطة!

Death Culture

blood news coming from the east... 20 Iraqis are killed in a car blast in Karkuk... and 5 Iraqi souldiers are blown off in Bakouba...and it's only 6:00pm...well, the [Courageous Resistance] is doing a great job there...

Shame on u... shame on anyone who'd feel okay to name this as [Resistance]... They ARE TERRORISTS... BLOODY FUNDEMENTALISTS... and THEY ARE TERRORISTS>>> and I don't care if Dick Cheney or Mr. Rumsfield or even Mr. Sharon, I don't care if they feel the same way... that doesn't change a bit of the truth out there... the fact that they are murderers killing Iraqis.. and the Syrian TV. is calling them [The Iraqi Resistance Groups]...

Human lives should be a little bit more precious... to us... This Death Culture that's making its way through our societies is frightining... young ppl from Syria, Kwait, Saudi Arabia... full of life... go to Iraq just to die and kill ppl... life must mean a little bit more than that... is it so hard to see that there's more to live than DEATH...

Tuesday, June 14, 2005


whenever I'm pissed and frustrated with how my life is shaping.. whenever I feel like I got 2 choices.. either to finish a full twist-less Smirnov [and NOT Ice-stupid-smirnov] or just crash it on the wall with every bit of anger I can... at these dark times,, Only 2 ppl can actually make their way to my brain cells.. only 2 ppl are there to blame.. MY PARENTS>> I just keep remembering all their flaws and all their life-or-death wrong choices...
I'm not gonna talk about my parents in specific.. I'll just talk about general mistakes parents ALWAYS do...
1- why r they named parents?! cuz they HAD kids!!! they couldn't just have safe sex.. they had to get kids.. US>>> into this stupid miserable planet... we're running out of water, oil, oxygen... and god knows what's happening with this ozone layer.. and they wanna bring yet another anathema to this world...!!!!! LOOK AROUND PARENTS>>> this ain't not kindergarten to get kids to...!!! stop BREEDING like rabbits...
2- ur here, okay great... u can walk and u can talk and everything... but would they let go, NOOOOO.. they have to LOVE ya...!! wow,,, couldn't they just teach us how to HUNT and MATE... and just let go... go live ur own damn life..!! NOO... they wanna cya talk, and they wanna cya in school, they wanna talk to ya about ur first kiss, help ya in ur science project, and go to PARENTS meetings... it gets even better.. THEY WANNA SEE U IN COLLEGE>>> even worse.. they want u to be successful!!!! OMG... how disturbing is that!!!!???... why can't we be BEINGS again.. just go hunt.. okay not hunt.. just buy stuff from jungle super markets..!!
3- they've done all these things.. and now ur a great successful active person in ur community.. guess what?!! they wanna see ya MARRIED>>>> so they talk and talk and talk... and u being such butthead (and beavis for what it matters) u get married... gues what.. next thing u know... UR GETTING kids...!!... ahhhhhhhhhhhhh this is a nightmare... PLZ>>> can anyone just plz STOP IT>>> I mean look around ya.. cows are starting to make fun of ya... whenever I look at "la vache keri" i feel like she's mocking me...!! monkies got actually bored with talking of how stupid u are...!!

what's my point?!!! STOP BREEDING... maybe if u stop KILLING eachother u won't need that awfull lot of new kids..!!!

anyways..., these thoughts only come-up in extreme situations.. other than that, I'm a very healthy person [or so says my psychiatrist]....and I'm planning to be a very successful and active part of my community... and so on.. ;) hehe
right now, I'm pretty content.. so.. I kinda LOVE my parents.. well, at least they learned from their mistake and NEVER did it again.. hehe


Monday, June 13, 2005

Love Hate Tragedy!

My computer, Dido, chubby girls, my camera, my music collection, not doing the dishes for a whole week, sleeping late, vodka without a twist, 7Up, hosting hitchhikers, Hitchhiking myself, my MP3 player, Watermelons, watching Autumun in New York for the zillionth time, Winona Ryder, MTV2, Oasis's new single, visiting Saladine Citadel, the light-damascene feminin arabic accent, my ma & pa, organizing my books, archiving my music, being a lonely kid and living alone, being an asssometimes, Donald Duck, Tiger in Winnie the Pooh, not answering the phone to hear ppl leaving msgs on the answering machine, politics, BBCWorld, The Tonight Show, Amin Maalouf, reading my dad's diaries, Jerry Seinfeld, showing off whenever possible, Slunfe, old damascus, my idiot bestfriends, being the idiot I am, my 7:30am nescafe, collecting photos, bumping into things, my memory drawer, basketball, Linus Turvalds, blue [THE COLOR], Face close-up pix, Yahoo! Messenger, seeing Placebo Live, my 17' ViewSonic, Oranges, Pasta (only if it's Aldente! hehe), one of my pants, showers, Umayyad mosque at sunset, formatting and re-installing my system, Ziad Rahbani, Fairuze ANYTIME and being a Syrian

my so-called subwoofers, Cate Blanchet, Marilyn Manson, Losing something, having to do dishes when they get smelly and bug(y), being snubbed, having such a messy house, next september when my parents gonna see the house, MBC4, my mobile phone, the last pants i got, big noses, losing sleep, fighting with someone, feeling cold, buzzing someone on Y! Messenger and not getting a buzz back, birthdays, the fact that i suck in French, having an asthma fit, getting a hair-cut, heavy rain, clouds, being stuck in my room because of my stupid door lock (always happens), deadlines, not knowing what's what, my high-school, waiting for someone, mexican beer, being bossed around, my dean of faculty, 3 of my professors, when having to fake things, doing paperwork, not having sth to watch on TV, running out of pens at 4am when u got an exam at 9am, Condolisa Rice's teeth, white [THE COLOR], most of the cafes in Latakia, my biology techer in high-school, hi5, having to say sorry, putting myself in such stupid situations, sharing my 7up with anyone, throwing up, and not knowing what's going on around me...

Sunday, June 12, 2005

Holly Book or Civil Law?!

In response to Stellar's comment on my last post on the "Protect Hijab" campaign... and her follow-up articles about the same subject.. [find them @ Stellar's Rollercoaster Journey]

Well, I'm quite familiar with Islam stellar, hehe... I'm muslem myself.. or at least born muslem and have been living within a society with a vast majority of muslems... ;)

I can see now that we have quite different coordinations regarding this particular subject... or let's say different prioroties..

I'm not gonna be debating about the obligation of Hijab... that's not the point (to me)... the point is which comes fist?! Quran? or Civil Law?!
for me civil law is much more hollier and important than any holly book, and that's for the exact same reason u take Quran as much more important... civil law is written by man! Quran is not...

Me, I don't consider myself religious in any way... I consider myself a human being.. belonging to a very creative species... That's why I respect civil law...

let me give ya this example.. My mom doesn't wear Hijab, but yet she's now working in Saudi Arabia.. and she is obligated by LAW to wear Hijab.. she does... and she's totally OK with that...
As long as the Saudi community [I have my reservation about this, but this a general example] is content with this law, it is much more important than any other obligation...same goes for France..

btw, France is the 2nd oldest republic in history and one of the oldest modern democracies on the planet... so I don't think it's that easy to go denying their democracy... based on individual events...

I respect ur obligations the way interpret them, I respect them to the limit... that limit is the state law..... The civil law is the one that sets ur Rights and Duties in modern societies... if the majority feels that the Quran is the best source for this law, then be it... if not... well..?! u tell me..?!

Another issue, who's to say that ur islam is the right one.. who's to say that ur islam is much more perfect than that of Bin Laden's, who's to say that Catholics in the 1400s are more rightous than those of the 2000s...?! religion is how u interpret it.. there isn't ONE right version... and no one can tell witch is better... Religion is a very abstract concept... Humans have the duty to interpret that concept the way they want... that's how I see this.... no one has the whole truth... I strongly believe in this fact...

Plus, I'm not religious, but I'm not anti-religion.. I don't see myself in any religion, yet I don't disrespect any of em... in light of that, I see this ban as a favor for Islam as culture and as a religion... it's a shock.. to wake this giant from a long sleep... religions are much more dynamic than we think, they do evolve... they NEED to evolve... Islam needs this kind of electricity to start evloving again...

600 years ago Islam was the leading religion when it came to openess and liberality compared to other religions at that time... now it is fallen behind in this race... It hasn't evolved a bit since the fall of Cordoba... and as a person who's proud to belong to such culture and history, even though I don't believe in some aspects of it, I see this in a very optimistic way...

My point is... for me, Mankind created Zeus and Afrodite... and Mankind destroyed their myth... that's how strong we are... and that's how creative we are... Mankind is God's spirit or even (for me, God himself)... so, the law that a certain community agrees on is much more important than any other law....

P.S.: I don't mean to offend any religion or any belief, and if I did, then I am very sorry about it.. and it wasn't on purpose for sure...
P.S.2: All these thoughts are my own point of views, they might be wrong and they might be right... I'm not saying that I KNOW, I'm saying that this is what I persoanlly BELIEVE is right!


One Really Dull Story!

Do u see that little iron pole in the middle of the pic?!well, there IS one, I assure ya... it's just that this pic was taken with my (MOST Hated) X600 mobile.. and it was like 3am... so... if anybody here is from Latakia, he'd recognize the spot... it's on a shelter.. near the City Hall..

okay.. I'm totally missing the point here..

anyways..2 hours earlier that night three "very lost and very hopeless" 19yo males were wandering aimlessly in downtown Latakia.. proudly I was one of those strayed gang... they came into this pole.. which I still donno what's his job was?!!The fat guy thought it'd be fun to just take it... infatuated with the adrenaline-aspect of the stealing process the yet-to-be-doctor said yeah sure... and as always the computer junkie went with the majority... so they took it... a 15kg iron pole.. Three 19yo males are now wandering with a 15kg iron pole on the fat guy's back... after a while, The fat guy noticing that it wasn't fun at all to carry this 15kg iron pole.. suggested that "It isn't fun at all to carry this 15kg iron pole!!!", the yet-to-be-doctor wasn't sure this time.. and since there's no obvious majority the computer junkie passed on the question, and tried to look like he didn't hear it.. after a 30sec negotiations the yet-to-be-doctor took the 15kg iron pole from the fat guy... and again the three 19yo started wandering aimlessly in the ghost-ish streets of downtown Latakia... about 2:30am.. the yet-to-be-doctor realized how much NOT funny it is to carry around a 15kg iron pole... so again.. the three guys stood there trying to decide what the fuck to do with this 15kg pole.... that was when the fat guy had this brilliant idea, "What if we put it there,, on top of that VERY high and hard-to-get shelter in the middle of this park... it'll be a symbol of us, and of how miserable this night was..!!" the yet-to-be-doctor voted yes... and so it is unanimously YES... after trying all sort of tricks to get it up there.. the three muskateers did it eventually.. and took that pic...!!!
nevertheless the next day three guys were wandering this same neighbourhood, and out of the blue, the fat guy cracks down laughing... the pole isn't there anymore...

this pic is actually the last picture of that symbol... if anybody seen it.. or knows anything about it.. plz call...

A huge thank-u to my 2 best friends... for there ability to turn such a miserable night into a good memory... Love ya both.. inspite of ur fatness and his doctor-ish issues...!
A huge sorry to everybody for suffering all the way here through this post... sorry guys... i had to write sth!


Another reading of the "Protect Hijab" campaign

I read the "Protect Hijab" post on Stellar's Rollercoaster Journey..... and I just needed to clear some points out...

Regardless of my own personal openion on the subject... I have few remarks...

1- The ban wasn't specially designed for the Hijab.. it was literally a ban on "Religious Symbols"... that's hell different....
2- This is a secular democracy. The ban was voted on.. and I think that it is absolutly legal... and if one wants to live in such democracy he needs to obey the simplest rules...
3- I don't see how this ban is a violation of religious rights... I'd like to have an explanation on that?!

In a secular system, steps should be taken to separate the state and religion.. this is a basic step.. and banning religious symbols in public institution goes in that category... and in any case religion might have an effect on civil institutions I think religion goes 2nd...

Modern states are built upon a so-called "Social Contract". By agreeing to be part of this state u are agreeing to this contract... and all the forms of this contract stressed the fact that the "group" abandons its individual rights to those of the "majority" not as individuals but as a wholesome (Jean Jack-Rouseau was one of the premiers to stress this fact)... and I believe this is exactly what's going on in France.. and until another revolutionary State theory comes up.. personally I'm sticking with this one...

I might compare this to Smoking Ban, and some might argue that smoking is actually clinically harmful, others will argue back that religious symbols are psychlogically harmful as well, because of what they suggest... and because of the differences and separations they might cause.. I still haven't made up my mind on this point.. but..

Finally, France is soveriegn state, and I don't think anyone (unless he's French) has the right to intervene in its internal affairs.. and I think that the Mufti of France made that clear in earlier statements.. (that I don't recall vividly) but I believe it was about -this issue being strictly a French internal issue that need to be solved between the French Muslim community and the French authorities- and so it happened... it was solved that way.

Saturday, June 11, 2005


yeah.. i did... with razor and everything... I feel sooooo clean right now... u can't imagine!!! I feel like I'm snowhite!!!
noo I'm not a retard... I just wanted to share, that's all...!

A Treason Draft

I just finished reading Muhammad MAGHOUT's latest book.. "East of Eden, West of God... - شرق عدن، غرب الله..."... all I know is that I have to talk about it.. I have to say sth.. the only problem is that I can't... I wish i had the ability to describe feelings, paint them.. I can't.. I can only scream them out.. this bitterness that rolls all over u when reading this book.. bitterness is the keyword for this compilation... I donno... the only ppl who would realy understand what I'm talking about.. is those who had read his "I Will Betray My Country - سأخون وطني"...
أيها الوطن الغارق في التفاهات
لن أنقذك مهما كان عندي من وسائل
فلطالما أسأتَ إليَ
من الرأس حتى أسفل القدم
حرمتني رؤية النجوم
تأمل الأفق
انتظار الفجر
رائحة الخبز
رسائل الحب
هدايا الأعياد
وحتى النوم على الرصيف
كنت تدفعني دفعاً
بجبالك وسهولك وثرواتك
للمصحات العقلية
ومعسكرات الإبادة
وأنا أسترضيك
والآن تريد أن أنظف ما تحتك وفوقك من خراب
وقد حذرتك مراراً
بأن الزمن ليس ساعة حول معصمك
أو قبعة على رأسك
أو سوطاً بيدك
أو حاجباً أمام مكتبك
ليس عندي وقت أضيعه فعندي موعد هام
مع عاهرة!
ومصابة بالإيدز والزهايمر.
فمت بغيظك...
Only words like these can actually take ur mind off what's going on.. can actually make u forget that Samir QASIR was blown off last week, that someone like Naji al-ALI isn't safe with his pen, that Major General Mustafa TLAS is talking in his diaries about his top of the line sterility treatment, that Mr. Saber FALHOUT is demanding the abolishment of the "Emergency Law" that he himself announced 42 years ago..  that the same ppl who were responsible for the Tadmur masacre are now the angels of democracy and reform...
All I want.. is to be able to breathe, I just... when I have my asthma fit, I wanna be able to open the window and actually BREATHE!! I wanna breathe...I don't wanna be afraid to show how much I love this land!! IS THAT TOO FUCKING MUCH TO ASK?!!!!

*The text is titled "A Treason Draft - مشروع خيانة" from the "East of Eden, West of God... - شرق عدن، غرب الله..." book..

Friday, June 10, 2005


Punch No1: The sum of ALL Arab countries' GDPs is less than Spain's...

Punch No2: Spain is the poorest memeber of the EU...

Punch No3: UNDP Report: Syria is gonna be a net importer of Oil by 2008...

Knock Out: Dr. Bouthaina Shabaan: Our economy is so strong, it's almost bulletproof!

Ouch... that hurts...

Hurray, I'm learning French!!!

soo, one of the most important stuff going on in my life lately are my french courses... I'm doing them at the CCF-Latakia.....
has anybody of ya studying french noticed how stupid the language is... I mean i like french ppl and everything and they're so sweet, lovely and there nice girls there I bet... but R YA GUYS THAT STUPID NOT TO BE ABLE TO DEIFFERNCIATE BETWEEN MALES AND FEMALES>>> all the grammar in French is about males and females... is it realy that hard in france to notice the difference without having to actually complicate the whole fucking language with all these nonsense!!!!! okay okay I know Arabic does the same... but HEY we're a developing nation.. we're allowed to be as much STUPID as we want..!!!!!!!! but ur FRANCE>>> HELLO!!

anways.. I'm losing track here... so my D2 teacher is a lovely french lady... let's just call her Mrs. D... she's soooo great and "sympa" + she's a blonde with this PERFECT haircut EVER... I donno how she does that but IT IS PERFECT>>> anyways...
two things I HATE the most bout her..
1. she MOCKS syrians!!! SHE DOES>>> and SHE DOES IT WITH ATTITUDE>>> and in a reallyyyyyy mean way.. how?! well, whenever we're talking about almost ANYTHING... she says sth like "Yeah, well syrians aren't noisy! are they?!" with a little devilish smile... and before u know the whole class starts "Yeah RIGHT" and starts making jokes... OMG PPPLLLLLLL>>> HOW MUCH IDIOTS CAN U ACTUALLY BE??????????? can't ya see she's MOCKING YA>>> SHE'S RUBBING UR NOSE TO THE DIRT>>> and U don't even KNOW!!! and whenever she does that... she truns at me with a VICTORY smile... NANANANANANAAAAAAAA!!!!!! OMG>>> at that time I'm like "HEY where were ya when my damascene ANCESTORS KNOCKED UR ANCESTORS in TOLOUSE HA ;) ????????????!!!! I bet, u weren't drinkin ur Pina Colada on a Hawaii beach ha?!! hehe....... comon sister, let's settle this right now right here!!!!! arghhhhhhh"!! *Snubby french*!! <<but u don't realy.. get the chance to say it...>> :(
2. SHE mocks me... she just loves to give me a laughing round everytime I sleep-off during a class... or when I'm late... I mean... How mean is SHE!!! it's enough humiliation that i'm sleeping in my seat.. to hear everybody LAUGHING ABOUT IT!!!

well... it isn't realy that bad realy... I was just kidding... cuz i wanted to talk about these courses and i got nothing to say... cuz stupid me couldn't catch a SINGLE french word during 6 months courses <<AND COUNTING>>!!!

sooo... thanx Mrs. D... for turning this horrible course into an enjoyable experience with lots of mocking.. ;) and I'm actually starting to get over the fact of how STUPID french language is... and Starting to like it... thanx to ya!! hehe ;) I'll be looking forward to the next course... ofcourse if u don't shoot me the next time I walk through that door.. ;)


Thursday, June 09, 2005

stupid stupid stupid

"receiving dept., 3 a.m.
staff cuts have socked up the overage
directives are posted.
no callbacks, complaints.
everywhere is calm.
Hong Kong is present
Taipei awakes
all talk of circadian rhythm

I see today with a newsprint fray
my night is colored headache grey
the bull and the bear are marking
their territories
they're leading the blind with
their international glories
I'm the screen, the blinding light
I'm the screen, I work at night.
I see today with a newsprint fray
my night is colored headache grey
don't wake me with so much.
I cried the other night
I can't even say why
fluorescent flat caffeine lights
its furious balancing
I'm the screen, the blinding light
I'm the screen, I work at night
I see today with a newsprint fray
my night is colored headache grey
don't wake me with so much. the
ocean machine is set to 9
I'll squeeze into heaven and valentine
my bed is pulling me.
daysleeper. daysleeper.
daysleeper. daysleeper. daysleeper"
R.E.M. - Daysleeper
well, i donno why i'm posting this song... maybe cuz I slept until 3pm... so I wouldn't remember that I actually passed out on the Physics 1 course... goddddddd... I'm so fucking stupid... ah... I hate me!

Wednesday, June 08, 2005

An attempt to read ahead!

In ten years time, there won't be Assad, Lahoud... there won't be Junblatt and there won't be Aoun...

but we'll be here... do u realy think that these are the best memories to carry with us...?!

let's not ruin our future....

Tuesday, June 07, 2005

Damien Rice - O

anybody heard of Damien Rice...
well, he's an Irish singer... he's great... I only heard his last album "O"... a typical catch-an-eye name for wierdos like me!!
I got it like a week ago.... well actually 3 of us split the price so i had to go through a night of negotiations to go home with the album before the other 2... and GOD, IT WAS WORTH IT!!!!!!!!!!

OMG... I've never felt an urge to cry when hearing music like this time...... I MISSED This feeling... I haven't felt like great music for a while now.. I donno maybe since Coldplay's "A Rush of Blood To The Head".... or Travis' "The Invisible Band".... anyways... this album is a MUST-GET.....

especially this track 7... "Cheers Darling"... I'm listening to it now.. god, it's a symbol of every fuck-up in ur entire life, every girl u should've been with, everytime u lost a friend, and everytime u felt like ur lonely as hell, every single thing u did wrong... everytime u felt like u wanna just die, and everytime u actually tried to!!!!!!! it goes along greatly with track 9 "I Remember"..... Perfect mixture of a suicidal-pill... this track has the perfect vocals i've ever heard... so good it gets into ur spine and fills every little space in ur hollow mind... u feel like ur head is working million times faster... lots of memories, ppl... things coming back.. lots of stuff being processed all over again.... I cried like hell the first time I heard it... sometimes u need this kinda motivation to just cry everything out.. all ur desperation and failures and all of those of the ppl surrounding u... when this track is finished... u'll get to the end of this horrible but yet astounding journey with a perfect lift-up.. track 10 "Eskimo"... u can actually smile again after hearing this track...

tiredness fuels empty thoughts
i find myself disposed
brightness fills empty space
in search of inspiration
harder now with higher speed
washing in on top of me so
i look to my eskimo friend when i’m down down down"

u feel like u just found ur Eskimo friend... and u wonder where has it been all these years...!

never to forget, track 3 "The Blower's Daughter"... if any of u had seen the movie "Closer" he must've been enchanted with the "I can't get my eyes off of you..." vocals all through the movie.. well this is "The Blower's Daughter"...

All the other tracks are just as good... but these are my personal favorites.. maybe cuz I can rflect on them... I'm sure u'll remember a lot of feelings long forgotten with this album.. I know I did...

The Show MUST NOT Go On!!

for any Queen fans, Sorry about the title! anyways,
on Feb. 20th.. On BBC World, it was a sunday and it was a Talking Point episode about the big event back then
"PM Hariri's Assasination - Syrian-Lebanese Relations"... earlier that week I happened to send a comment to BBC about that program and becuz of it. They called me on air..
I don't remeber what I babled there, but, the one thing I remeber was Mrs. Shabaan replying that "Syrian withdrawal of Lebanon was a BILATERAL issue for the two states to decide", needless to say, a couple months after, They pulled the troops out, and needless to say too, that it wasn't the lebanese gvmt. that asked Syrian troops out.. it was international pressure (not undermining the effect of march 14th rev.)...
It's just that, how bold can u be to just lie like that, more important how STUPID!!!!! is Mrs. Shabaan gonna be our next "Muhammed Said Sahhaf"?????!! we got a whole set of Iraq staff down here, we just needed this kind of Press person.. great we got it.. call the US in..!!!
well, most of ya saw the press briefing she did today, that was exactly like "OMG, Do u think that all these reporters here are bunch of idiots?!!!!!!" Damn, she's got nerve!
Moving on into piss up no2
I AM SYRIAN, I LIVE ON THIS LAND>> AND I AM INSULTED, I FEEL VIOLATED BY THIS PARTY'S CONGRESS!!! How can ya summerize one of the first ever inhabited places on the planet with one party?!!! I don't feel okay, when the future of almost 20millions inside syria -and god knows how many abroad- is attached to one party congress!!!
I wanna know, how can the same person who read the Bulletin No1 witch called for the "Emergency Laws" 40 years ago turn into a pro-democracy angel calling for that same Law to be removed... how can ya trust the same ppl who had strangeled syrians for the last 40 years to be the new era reformers... I don't!!  I just don't...

Sunday, June 05, 2005

English Summer Rain

"Hold your breath and count to ten,
And fall apart and start again,
Hold your breath and count to ten,
Start again, start again...
Hold your breath and count your step,
And fall apart and start again,
Start again...
they were just singing this same verse last year when I totally lost it...
yeah, a year ago Placebo were in byblos, I've had the time of mylife there.... at this song exactly I moved to the left front side of the stage... there was nothing between me and those triple-x-humungous speakers... it's like drinking double vodka solo... the only girl who to stand there asked me "r ya high on sth?!?????" well.. yeah ofcourse i was high on placebo!! ;)
and u know what... here's the thing.. i was jumping all around the place with a BROKEN leg..!! yup.. I kinda broke it in the middle of my bakaloria tests.. like a week before the concert... and I couldn't miss that concert...!! and I was right..!!!! but the worst moments were when I lost my glasses... so I was like half-blind with a broken leg looking for my friend after the party... with 1000s of ppl storming out!!!! that was pretty humiliating...

Old ME back bumping and kicking!!!

morning.. or maybe good afternoon...!! I'm still dizzy from yesterday.. though I got myself couple hourse of sleep..
exam?! sux big time... I'm totally screwed next year./.. TOTALLY
today, I regained the LOST ME again... I did sth haven't done for quite a while now... I bumped into every single post I could find on the way to college... I felt so happy being the old stupid buthead bumper... I BUMPED INTO ALL OF EM>>> U CAN'T IMAGINE>>> I'm walking all normal and tryna get last minutes equations, and all of the sudden a lighting post!! OUCH>> I even tripped down like 3 times... I'm so happy today.. I feel like me again.. why?!
go check the lighting posts near my school!!! yeah.. those we're great days.. at least ppl got used to it.. after a while it doesn't seem so funny to have someone flat on his face.. or breaking his nose into a lighting post!
another huge event today... RML FM or (99 FM>> I HATE THE NEW NAME) is finally back on air... at least where I live...!! damn this station rox.. especially..LAURA!!! wow... she's got the sexiest voice on the FM waves.. she gives shivers when she speaks.. for 3 years "Live @ 10" was my favorite talk, both on TV and Radio/// not a great achievement, if u take in consideration that the only channels I had on TV is Syria1 and Syria2...!! ;)
btw, anybody heard Oasis' new single "Lyla"... IS IT BREATHTAKING OR WHAT?! wow.. the guitar the clip.. the girl... the band... I just love them... I'm definitly getting that album!!

Saturday, June 04, 2005

rush hour...

I got Logic Algebra final exam tomorrow...
and here I am.. writing blogs.. and watching Scrubs... that gives a pretty good insight on how I'm feeling right now... HORRIBLE HORRIBLE DAY>>> I mean... the News are never great... but at least u get to go out freshen up before coming back to stupid drunk reality... well, NOT today!!

I got 70 pages of mathematical eqations and unbelievably impossible-to-understand abstract theories... and I'm stuck here writing blogs... DAMN... I mean after at least 13yrs in the school buisness as a student.. how stupid am I to still believe that "well i'll do it through the night... I'll pull a full nighter.. and we'll live happily ever after"... well.. I'm exactly that stupid....!!!!!! it's 8pm for heavens sake...

"Don't delay today's work..." how easy is that to say!!! wow... these sayings reaaaly realy don't work...!!

I watched stuff for like the zillionth time today... I'm that desperate... and everybody's out STUDYING... I hate u guys... why can't we all just fail this course!!! damn u...

+ I gotta do the dishes... now how bad is that?!!!!!

let's keep fingers crossed...!!!



In tribute to Samir QASIR...
One of those who managed to get Syria alongside Lebanon when talking about FREEDOM...!! a personal Thank You from a very grateful Syrian...

I reckon ur not gonna be here to see this... but we'll have our March 14th... I don't care when.. but I'm pretty damn sure we will... I'd like to think that u ppl got satellite channels up there to see Syrians get their independence too......

Thank You Mr. QASIR... I guess I won't be checkin on Annahar every friday... at least not with that rush...!!!